


Stay Alive

by Ookami_Chi



Category: Daredevil (TV), The Defenders (Marvel TV)
Genre: Because yes, F/M, I'm flying by the seat of my pants, I'm still ruined by the ending of defenders, Matt needs a hug, Please Don't Kill Me, Slow burning love, get ready for cute domestic shit
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-14
Updated: 2017-09-22
Packaged: 2018-12-29 23:13:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12095547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ookami_Chi/pseuds/Ookami_Chi
Summary: [Title inspired by Hamilton]Jessica never stopped thinking about Matt after the bombs went off and the building collapsed over top of him--how he had tricked them into leaving him behind in that hole.She couldn’t let herself believe he had died, to just move on as the others had. Not that she could blame them. Luke had gone back to his apartment with Claire, Danny was...doing whatever the hell he was doing, and she was sitting in front of her lap top, scouring for any sign that that idiot Murdock was still out there, somehow.He just couldn’t be dead. She couldn’t allow it.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So, theoretically I should be working on "It's Where My Demons Hide" (and I promise that the next chapter is being worked on, I'm just a super busy college student so please don't kill me) but the ending of Defenders actually ruined me so I had to make a fan fiction for my new favorite ship. 
> 
> Also, I'm just obsessed with cute domestic shit that involves Matt being vulnerable, so that's probably a theme that will play out in my works... 
> 
> Enjoy! :D

Jessica never stopped thinking about Matt after the bombs went off and the building collapsed over top of him--how he had tricked them into leaving him behind in that hole.

She couldn’t let herself believe he had died, to just move on as the others had. Not that she could blame them. Luke had gone back to his apartment with Claire, Danny was...doing whatever the hell he was doing, and she was sitting in front of her lap top, scouring for any sign that that idiot Murdock was still out there, somehow. 

He just couldn’t be dead. She couldn’t allow it. 

And so began the sleepless nights filled by the glare of her computer screen and a bottle of cheap as booze, straining her eyes against the darkness. When she was not in her office, she was back at Midland Circle, retracing their steps through the rubble to the best of her ability in the middle of the night, cursing his name. 

“Jess,” Trish said from the doorway, “I know he must have meant a lot to you, but don’t you think it’s about time that you moved on? I mean, it’s been weeks…” 

Jess just snorted, throwing back another swig of her bottle. She had already had this conversation with Trish a few days ago, and she did not feel the need to repeat herself. Eventually, Trish got the memo that she was not going to give up on this wild goose chase that Jess had set herself to, and left.

Eventually, the others stopped checking in on her too. They were convinced this was her way of coping. They were convinced he was dead. 

She never stopped believing that he was alive. 

“You have got to be fucking kidding me,” Jess muttered to herself, staring at her comparing the pictures she had taken to those that she had found leaked online. They were blurry, but the rubble was familiar, as was the figure that she was sure had to be him, though she couldn’t be quite sure just who was carrying him. It would take more digging before she realized that he had ended up in the care of nuns of all people, like the fucking catholic idiot he was.

 

___

 

“Jess, what the hell are we doing exactly?” Trish hissed from beside her, more hesitant than she was to approach the doors of the church. Jess didn't answer. She had only told Trish that she needed her to drive her somewhere. She couldn't tell her that they were about to kidnap Daredevil. 

She could explain that later. Right now she was focused on getting Matt out of here. “Follow me.”

As expected, the nuns weren't exactly happy to see her, but she already knew where they were keeping Murdock, and she pushed her way toward the room with Trish apologizing on her way behind her. It didn't matter. Nothing mattered as long as they got him. She was not going to leave him behind again. 

Jess pushed open the door to his room, but hesitated upon seeing him for the first time in almost a month. They had kept him in what looked like an old hospital bed, an IV in his arm and sterile, white bandages around his chest, the rough blue blanket pulled up to his waist. It wa his eyes that got to her though, unfocused as he seemed to wake up. 

“Jess?” God, he sounded terrible, his voice rough and grating. His face warped afterward, seemingly from pain. She grimaced in response, crossing the room to stand by his side in long strides

“Shut up and rest, Murdock,” she muttered, dealing with the IV drip--morphine. Geez. Explained how pathetic he looked. She had never seen him look so fucking vulnerable. “I'm getting you out of here.”

Trish entered the room in a daze as Jess scooped Matt into her arms, his head against her chest as his eyes slid closed once more, out for the count. She did not have time to take in Trish’s wide eyes, her mouth already open, a million questions racing in her mind. 

“Grab his things,” she said, jerking her head toward the devil suit. She would have time to answer her questions later--would have to answer them later, but not right now. 

It's going to be okay Matt, she thought as she stared down at the blind lawyer, who looked so much younger without those red glasses he always wore, his hair tousled by sleep. He had probably been through hell. 

“What the hell is going on, Jess?” Trish finally asked when they had tucked Matt into her bed. He was already shivering from the lack of morphine. She could only guess how long they had had him on it. “We can't take care of him on our own, he needs a medical professional and…he's daredevil, isn't he?” 

“I know someone,” Jessica said, ignoring Trish’s second question, instead watching Matt’s eyes flicker as he slept, shoulders trembling. Fuck, she would probably have to get Claire over here in the morning. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath in which Jessica and others deal with the realization that Matt is alive.

“You’re an idiot, Murdock.” 

_ True,  _ Matt thinks. Those words are the first thing he hears as he comes to as someone is picking him up, supposedly out of a car--but he can’t quite tell. His memory is hazy, and he can’t remember the last time he was awake. He shrugs at the statement, or at least, he thinks he shrugs. It’s hard to tell through the heavy cloud. Before he knows it they are going up, and the person carrying him has a loud, pounding heartbeat, one that is oddly familiar. 

_ Jessica? _

There is someone else behind them, their heart is racing, and he can only just catch the snippets of their conversation beyond the fog that begins to smother him. The pounding heartbeat has moved away. 

He hears the women whisper “Daredevil” in a mixture of fear and excitement before he falls back into the darkness.

 

____   
  


“Where did you find him?” 

Jess sighs at Luke’s question. He’s shocked, of course. She had called Claire that morning, hopefully to keep things between them, but she should have known Luke would have found out about Matt Murdock’s miraculous return from the grave. So here they were, sitting outside of her bedroom, waiting for Claire to declare some kind of verdict on their fallen friend.

“Nuns,” she answered, taking a swig of beer. She had a feeling she would need it today.

“Nuns,” Luke echoed in disbelief, one brow raised as he leaned back in his seat. He was waiting for more information, but she did not have any to give. She had no idea how Matt had managed to get out of the rubble or how he had ended up in their care. Only Matt could answer those questions, and even then...he might know the answers himself. 

“It doesn’t matter now,” Jess said, staring at the closed door to her room. Matt was back again, and that was all that mattered right now. Claire was here now, and she could help him recover, and then she would be done with it. The asshole could be on his way and she could move on with her life now that she had confirmed that he was also, in fact, alive.

Luke shook his head, whether disappointed in her, or something else entirely, she didn’t really care. “We thought he was dead, Jessica, and then Matt just...appears again? I think it is definitely something that needs to be considered. Does Danny know?” 

“No, and he doesn’t  _ need  _ to know.” She had thought this was all over when Midland Circle had fallen. They had all gone their separate ways.

“He has the right to know.” There is a note of finality to Luke’s voice that tells her all she needs to know. Whether she liked it or not, Danny would now be involved in all of this nonsense. Great.

They had fallen back into uncomfortable silence until Claire makes her way out of the bedroom, wiping her forehead with the back of her hand. “He’s going to be okay,” she explains as she takes a seat in the office area. “Whoever was treating him before had some kind of medical knowledge, but right now he is dealing with morphine withdrawal.”

“And what exactly does that entail?” Luke asks. The concern is back on his face, clear as day. Luke was the kind of person that expressed emotions, Jessica realized, someone that actually cared for other people. 

“Anxiety, fatigue, disorientation,” Claire said, her hands on her hips as she glanced back at the bedroom. “It might seem like he has a flu, but it should subside within a week.” 

Luke nodded solemnly. “How can we help?” 

 

_____

 

The cloud is lighter when Matt comes to, less smothering and more...The word escaped him, and his brow furrowed as he tried to make sense of his surroundings. It all felt like a dream, with the last thing he remembered was… 

_ Elektra. _

He nearly bolted out of the bed at the thought of her, but he was stopped by strong arms that guided him back down to an old, unfamiliar mattress. “It’s okay Matt,” a voice said, seeming to mean to calm him. “Claire said you need to stay in bed, you’re still recovering from your injuries…” 

“What?” His own voice sounds raspy, as if he has not seen water in days. His throat feels raw. The source of the voice steadies him as he coughs, calling to someone else to bring him a glass of water that the voice carefully guides to his lips. Matt steadied his breathing before he made to speak again. “Where am I?” 

“Jessica brought you to her apartment,” the voice answers, and Matt could hear the heartbeat associated with it. 

“Luke?”

“Yeah,” Luke answers. The bed gives out a groan as he seems to sit back, but he is still by Matt’s side. “How are you feeling?” 

Matt grimaced as he made to sit up, the creaking of his own ribs telling him that it was not the greatest idea he had had in the world. “Been better,” he admitted truthfully to the sound of Luke’s low chuckling.

“I’m not surprised, considering everything that happened,” he replies. Something in his voice tells Matt that there is more that Luke wants to say, but he is silent, seeming to lay against the wall that the bed sits against, and Matt is left to listen to the other man’s heart beat--slow and steady. 

Matt feels himself slip back into unconsciousness, but Luke does not move from his side.

 

____

 

Trish paces across Jessica’s office, her hands on her hips as she seems to try to wrap her mind around the new information about the man sleeping in Jessica’s bed--the man who is Daredevil. 

And Daredevil is blind.

“But how does that work?” Trish asks Jessica again, “How does a blind man do everything he does? I mean...for God’s sake, he fights criminals, Jess!” 

“Hell if I fucking know,” Jessica replies, rolling her eyes as she sits back in her chair, her boots resting on the desk. An outsider would have never known that the same woman had obsessed over a missing person’s files for months, determined to prove that he was still alive. “You can ask him yourself when he wakes up.”

Trish sighs, forced back to her pacing. From the half opened door to Jessica’s bedroom, she can see the unconscious vigilante on the bed, his chest rising and falling and Luke Cage watches over him. He shivers in his sleep, restless as a child with a cold. In turn, Luke wipes the sweat from his forehead with a wash cloth. 

 

____

 

Jessica is distracted from her current case by a muffled thumping sound coming from the bedroom, accompanied by a low groan. Under her breath, she curses Murdock for choosing to stay underground, and causing all of this shit for her, but she makes her way to the bedroom anyway. At least then she would be able to tell the idiot to calm the fuck down. 

Except, she doesn’t enter the room right away, but hesitates in the doorway instead. Matt’s eyes are frantically glancing every which way, as if trying to figure out where he is as his hands clench around the sheets, his knuckles pale. There is a sheen of sweat across his forehead and chest as he struggles to keep an even breath. It’s almost like he’s hyperventilating.

_ Fuck. _

She doesn’t know how to handle this crap--the anxiety that Claire had mentioned would follow with the withdrawal from the morphine the nuns had him on. At least when Luke had been here he seemed to have a knack for calming him down, a gentleness to his nature that Jessica simply did not have.

“Matt,” she puts on the voice she uses that usually “appeals” to other people, the one she uses when she needs to get something from someone. Only, this doesn’t work on Matt. In fact, he is almost certain it just causes him to freak out more and she is half tempted to call Luke to bring his ass back over here and handle it, but it’s the middle of the fucking night and she just doesn’t want to deal with that. Murdock has already managed to tangle himself up into her blankets, and she is pretty sure that isn’t helping anything. She sighs as she moves to help him unwrap himself from the trap he has created, only to nearly catch a fist to the face.

“Will you fucking calm down already?” 

Like a switch had been flipped, Matt freezes for an instant before relaxing into the pillows, confusing lining his face as he angles his head to the left, probably using echolocation or whatever the hell allows him to do what he does. “Jess?” 

“Yeah, it’s me,” she drawled, rolling her eyes as she takes a seat on the bed, careful not to jostle him too much. She isn’t that much of a bitch. “You gonna stop freaking out now?” 

Matt snorts in response, his gaze directed somewhere off to the left. He doesn’t add anything else to it, but she has a feeling he did not want her to see him like this. 

“You aren’t the first guy I’ve seen have a panic attack,” She supplies, resting her back against the wall, her arms resting over her chest. Murdock doesn’t seem to impressed with her offer. He’s quick to change the subject. 

“How long have I been out?” 

Jessica shrugs, aware that he is not able to appreciate the gesture. “A couple of days. You have been in and out for the most part.”

“Drugs?” 

“The nuns had you on morphine.” 

“Explains things,” Matt murmured, relaxing further into the pillows as he let out a sigh. Jessica doesn’t ask him to elaborate, and he doesn’t speak any further on the subject. In fact, she could have just left him then. He had finally calmed down and she could leave and get back to work. 

But she doesn’t. 

“Why did you do it?” 

He closes his eyes at her question. “What do you mean?” 

“Don’t bullshit me, Murdock, you know what I am asking.” 

He turns his head away from her, his still recovering injuries the only thing keeping him from completely turning his back on her. There was a tension that had renewed itself in his shoulders, and his fist clenched around the blanket that he held up against his chest. “I thought I could save her.” 

Jessica massaged her temples at his answer. Of course it was for the fucking ninja woman--his ex-girlfriend turned assassin by the Hand. “And?” 

“She tried to kill me,” Matt murmured. “She’s gone now.” 

Jessica bit her lip as she leaned forward, her elbows on her knees. “So it’s over now.”

“Yeah, it’s over.”


End file.
